I enjoyed reading this and recalling some very strong and sad emotions from when l had to make the decision to overdose my old man on morphine at the hospital. Well, it was either him come home and choke to death within a couple of weeks maximum, or me make the decision for my dear mum, who was lost in the moment and was in no fit state to do so. In hindsight, i think the choking option would have been the least distressing. Bless you brother , for what you had to endure at such an early age.🙏🏻
It hurt a bit to read that. My Dad is dead now also. The bit about getting the most out of every situation, I can relate to. I think that’s similar to a lot of working class people. But, you give, you give a lot with your streams and your time. The entertainment I have had from some dark places over the years has been invaluable to me. In 2018 I stayed in a hotel for two weeks after abandoning my missus and her family (in-laws) in Ireland during a holiday over a stupid argument. I escaped back to the UK. I didn’t know what would happen or where I’d end up (luckily it all worked out) but your videos took the edge off a very depressing situation. Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you and I’m very glad I typed Jo Guest into YouTube one day and discovered your (gud) vids.
I so enjoyed reading that, Chris. To me you delivered a very different piece of writing: very personal, honest, and heartfelt. It stirred emotions and inspired ideas and thoughts regarding my own circumstances in life with my parents. But most of all it confirmed that death is a part of life and we need to not be afraid to talk about it. Working for a hospice as I do, we deal with death on a daily basis, and it's helped me to be able to confront whatever lies ahead. I'm hoping and assuming you got a lot out of writing that. Because I certainly did from reading it. Well done, Chris. Your dad would be proud.
This story has left me feeling in-between pissed off and sad ,not quite shed a tear. Bit like when my own Dad died 14 years ago . "Don't tell your father" manipulative bastards ain't they mothers.Great writing nice one X
"People say to me, “Do you still think about your dad?” which misses the point entirely. Neither do I start thinking about you, nor do I stop. You are always there, a part of me. Actually, I am always here, a part of you."
Brutal to read, rare anything can get me to shed two tears, rare to get me to shed one.
Fantastic. A so-called therapist I'm 'seeing' currently has told me to do this - write letters to my dead mum - she's been gone 5 years now, and I still can't talk about her without blubbering like an 8 year old girl... Ours dads were clearly very much the same, though, my old boys still about, walking around with a new tart... I mentioned it to this 'therapist', saying it's just how men from that era acted in my area, and they acted like I'd said something stupid.... fcuk these people, they don't know sh1t. Reading your letter to your dad has been more therapeutic to me than talking to that dumb munta!!!
I have to say, I was bowled over by this piece of writing!! You weaved stories together amidst honesty, saying the things one would think but isn’t really supposed to say, I loved that. Harsh in places but beautiful and in many ways, the kind of letter, I suspect all sons would like to write to their father.
There is so much there to dissect/ un-pack. Like a layered cake revealing itself behind cracked icing. I held off on this particular substack cos i knew it would be honest and raw, reminiscent of the time i felt flushed with guilt for reading my big sisters badly hidden, secret diary.
With adult eyes and understanding you forgave and said sorry in unison, while recognising you are conversing with the part of you that is him.
Chris, a very powerful, candid & authentic piece. Just reading a few of the comments, it's obviously caused a lot soul searching, nostalgia & painful introspection for many that read it. That is powerful stuff indeed. Not me though Chris, I'm hard as nails innit. 😉
Thanks Chris a really beautiful piece, which resonates massively. . the failure of conversations, the messiness of death. It shouldn't be like that. Its how they get us, maybe. Incredible. Thank You.
I really liked reading this moving piece. Thankfully, I have not experienced nothing like this, but I have seen my parents go through it with grandparents.
An excellent heartfelt and beautiful piece of writing, could feel the emotion and love from the well chosen words as well as the pondering upon how you felt and feel about it all.
I enjoyed reading this and recalling some very strong and sad emotions from when l had to make the decision to overdose my old man on morphine at the hospital. Well, it was either him come home and choke to death within a couple of weeks maximum, or me make the decision for my dear mum, who was lost in the moment and was in no fit state to do so. In hindsight, i think the choking option would have been the least distressing. Bless you brother , for what you had to endure at such an early age.🙏🏻
It hurt a bit to read that. My Dad is dead now also. The bit about getting the most out of every situation, I can relate to. I think that’s similar to a lot of working class people. But, you give, you give a lot with your streams and your time. The entertainment I have had from some dark places over the years has been invaluable to me. In 2018 I stayed in a hotel for two weeks after abandoning my missus and her family (in-laws) in Ireland during a holiday over a stupid argument. I escaped back to the UK. I didn’t know what would happen or where I’d end up (luckily it all worked out) but your videos took the edge off a very depressing situation. Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you and I’m very glad I typed Jo Guest into YouTube one day and discovered your (gud) vids.
I so enjoyed reading that, Chris. To me you delivered a very different piece of writing: very personal, honest, and heartfelt. It stirred emotions and inspired ideas and thoughts regarding my own circumstances in life with my parents. But most of all it confirmed that death is a part of life and we need to not be afraid to talk about it. Working for a hospice as I do, we deal with death on a daily basis, and it's helped me to be able to confront whatever lies ahead. I'm hoping and assuming you got a lot out of writing that. Because I certainly did from reading it. Well done, Chris. Your dad would be proud.
glad you wrote that.
That made my wife cry..
Hilarious and emotional at the same time.
The Ribena stained mouth French exchange student had me in stitches.
A very good read from Dangerfield.
RIP Alfie and Janet ❤️
This story has left me feeling in-between pissed off and sad ,not quite shed a tear. Bit like when my own Dad died 14 years ago . "Don't tell your father" manipulative bastards ain't they mothers.Great writing nice one X
Emotional. Just wished I had the pleasure, privilege and time to even got to know my Dad.
Cheers Chris. Never forget the band you both had. All those Father/Son moments that shaped you.
"People say to me, “Do you still think about your dad?” which misses the point entirely. Neither do I start thinking about you, nor do I stop. You are always there, a part of me. Actually, I am always here, a part of you."
Brutal to read, rare anything can get me to shed two tears, rare to get me to shed one.
More emotional to me than my Grandad's death.
Fantastic. A so-called therapist I'm 'seeing' currently has told me to do this - write letters to my dead mum - she's been gone 5 years now, and I still can't talk about her without blubbering like an 8 year old girl... Ours dads were clearly very much the same, though, my old boys still about, walking around with a new tart... I mentioned it to this 'therapist', saying it's just how men from that era acted in my area, and they acted like I'd said something stupid.... fcuk these people, they don't know sh1t. Reading your letter to your dad has been more therapeutic to me than talking to that dumb munta!!!
Thank you, bruv. Look forward to the next one.
I have to say, I was bowled over by this piece of writing!! You weaved stories together amidst honesty, saying the things one would think but isn’t really supposed to say, I loved that. Harsh in places but beautiful and in many ways, the kind of letter, I suspect all sons would like to write to their father.
I was holding back the tears at the end
There is so much there to dissect/ un-pack. Like a layered cake revealing itself behind cracked icing. I held off on this particular substack cos i knew it would be honest and raw, reminiscent of the time i felt flushed with guilt for reading my big sisters badly hidden, secret diary.
With adult eyes and understanding you forgave and said sorry in unison, while recognising you are conversing with the part of you that is him.
Chris, a very powerful, candid & authentic piece. Just reading a few of the comments, it's obviously caused a lot soul searching, nostalgia & painful introspection for many that read it. That is powerful stuff indeed. Not me though Chris, I'm hard as nails innit. 😉
Thanks Chris a really beautiful piece, which resonates massively. . the failure of conversations, the messiness of death. It shouldn't be like that. Its how they get us, maybe. Incredible. Thank You.
I really liked reading this moving piece. Thankfully, I have not experienced nothing like this, but I have seen my parents go through it with grandparents.
An excellent heartfelt and beautiful piece of writing, could feel the emotion and love from the well chosen words as well as the pondering upon how you felt and feel about it all.
Kudos Danger.